Courtney's Confession


So Worth Loving challenged me to do this.
I hope it inspires someone to love themselves more & embrace being single. I am 24 and have never had a real relationship. I had a 7th grade boyfriend & an 8th grade boyfriend that lasted for a whole 4 or 5 days. Until it came time to do what boyfriends and girlfriends do by holding hands, and the thought of that was terrifying, so we had to break up. I liked a few boys in high school but they never liked me enough to date me.
It tore me up inside to know that my friends had boyfriends and I never liked the boys who liked me.
I got to college and it seemed that boys for some reason found me attractive, well, every girl attractive. But it felt good regardless. I realized how nervous I was to pursue a guy, so I resorted to drinking to build liquid courage. I realized how insecure I was about my body and resorted to a diet of 500 calories a day to lose 20lbs in a month.
But I had what I wanted. I had attention, until I realized that weekend that only attention from guys was not enough. I thought there was something wrong with me. It wasn’t until about 2 years ago that I realized that I am not single because I am overweight, because I am not pretty enough or that I am not good enough for anyone.
I am single because I choose it, it is not a curse. I have places to see, people to meet and things to experience before I settle down.
Sometimes I forget this and there are days I want to just date someone, but I know that this time in my life is meant to experience the world. I now know that there is nothing wrong with me.I am not defined by the amount of people who have loved me romantically.
If you’re single and you wonder why, maybe there’s something you’re supposed to be doing other then waiting for a person to define you.
Get out there and embrace the adventure before you. Remember you’re not the problem, you are worthy of love, but that love sometimes starts with loving yourself.
We are sharing stories this month of ways to love yourself and love people. Share your story or piece of advice with a picture of yourself and hashtag #loveyoulovepeople