For once in many years I did not begin this year with an expectation. I did not plan, I did not set goals.
After 2012, a year I wanted to leave behind, I decided, quietly, that this year I would give it all up and just live. For me, 2013 was a year that I would live without expectation.
This was a major step.
This would be a year I would give myself the gift to just be okay with whatever life sent my way. This was a year I would give myself freedom.
It’s difficult, even for a writer like me, to put into words what this meant; for it means so much more than not planning what I would wear the next day, or what job I would go back to in a year. For me, it would be a year which would allow me to love myself completely. It would be a year that daily I would make choices and be 100% okay with the outcome. It would be a year that I would live without regret.
If I ate something that wasn’t so great for my fitness goals, then, that’s okay. I’ll take it in stride. If I let myself fall for the boy that didn’t like me back, that was okay. It was a year of forgiveness, of freedom.
2013 was a year that I would live, to the best of my ability, that no matter what, I was worth loving.
For me, being so worth loving does not excuse bad behavior, it does not excuse lack of self-improvement. Know this, understanding that you and those around you are so worth loving is not a self-righteous attitude.
Knowing your worth means that we value who we are as human beings and value others. This is true freedom.
This is freedom from your relationship status.
This is freedom from a job title.
This is freedom from the label on your jeans.
This is freedom from the past choices you have made.
This is freedom from those circumstances that have happened to you.
So with this freedom, with the knowledge that I am worth loving, as a created individual with a purpose on this earth, I began 2013.
And now…with the year coming to a close I sit back and look at the end of the beginning. Living a year without expectation has given me the room to grow. It has allowed me to see where I want to improve and what can stay the same. It has shown me facets of my future that scare me and yet I know it will all work out. 2013 has shown me, again, who I do not need in my life and those I want to draw closer to, maybe even for the rest of my life. Who knows?
This year has allowed me to have a trust like no other. I challenge you, give yourself a bit of slack in 2014. Allow yourself the freedom to make mistakes, to overcome the past, to do or stop doing whatever it is that is holding you back.
So, goodbye to the beginning…and hello to whatever the future holds.
Post by Michelle Plett
Michelle Plett is sensitive, creative, intelligent, passionate, blonde and easily bored. Purveyor of all things beautiful, passionate for the fight against injustice in the world and the lack of value put on humanity.